My Dream

A little back story: I got married young.  I was 21 and DJ was 25.  I may have been young, and we may have both still been in school, but we both had  full time jobs, and could support ourselves.  DJ has had his career job for years, he owned his own house.  The idea of waiting until I was older to get married, would have simply been for the sake of waiting until I was older.  A week after our 6th month anniversary we found out Karson was on his way.  Not exactly what we were planning, but we couldn't have been more excited.  


I have always been a rule follower.  I did well in High School.  College wasn't even a question.  Of course I would go. I went to a reputable college, for 4 years, studying to be an Elementary Special Ed. Teacher. I knew I wanted to stay home when I had kids, but, of course, I needed a back up.  I loved teaching, so getting my teaching degree made the most sense.  I could teach for a few years, stay home when my babies were little, and go back to teaching when they were in school. 

Except, I didn't finish college. 

I am a college drop out.

A few weeks ago, I was at the store with Karson & Aunt Katie, and ran into someone I had not seen in years & years.  He obviously didn't know I was a Mommy, and was a little lot taken back by it.  To be honest, our conversation infuriated me...which is difficult to do.  In front of my almost 2 year old, I was insulted about being a Mommy.  His daughter is single and has a career, and is seeing the world...and ...and ...and...she is living the dream.   In front of Karson...


I am thankful he is little.  I am thankful, it all went over his head.  I am thankful...and hopeful..he didn't understand the conversation, where it was implied kids are a burden.  


I dropped out of college...because being a teacher wasn't my dream.  Being a teacher was my back up.


My dream was to be a Stay at Home Mom.

I spend my days making pretend cheese sand witches, hearing about 'choo-choos,' and racing cars on the wood floor, and snuggling.  I pick up toys, change diapers, make meals, and fold the laundry.  I always have an almost 2 year old running up to me to give me a huge hug, or to tell me 'mowee' is on his 'b,' or asking me to put on the 'ho ho' song and dance with him. 

I got married young.
I became a Mommy young.
I may not have a college degree.
I may not travel the world.
I may not have a career.

But, I am living my dream.

please don't think that i am saying that you shouldn't get a degree, or travel the world, or be a working mama.  that is not at all what i am trying to say.